Taking a drive with the family, going on a mini adventure with no destination in mind, just enjoying the journey together – I love those. But only so far as I kind of know where I am. I am more of an adventurer than an explorer, in that regard. I don’t want to find the New World, like Columbus. I’d rather explore the jungles I’ve at least read up on, like Indiana Jones.

Our emotional journeys and those of our kids often feel like a jungle as well. And just like Indy, we often get a little lost in the jungles we thought we knew so well. We often take a turn we’ve never seen before on our joyride and struggle to get back to what we’re familiar with. But any Indy fan will know, just as every person who’s ever gotten lost while driving around will know – there’s always a way out.

Raiders of the mood swing

Now just imagine yourself – fedora on your head, whip attached to your belt – roaming through the jungle of emotions like Indiana Jones. Following in your path is your little adventurer – climbing over the cot and jumping off the school pavilion’s highest step as your heart skipped a beat was just the beginning for them. Unnoticed, amidst the jungle’s silence of rustling leaves and the constant buzz of insect life, the genetically modified vines (courtesy of a scientist held hostage by the true villain) had caught hold of your partner. Their feet kick out as they’re lifted into the air, cutting at the vines to no effect. They can’t break free from the jungle of emotions alone. You are their last hope.

Saving your child from the genetically modified vines that threaten to entangle them, just waiting to send them into crankiness, is all up to you. What we so often do, unfortunately, is stare, panic-stricken, as the vines entangle us as well. Now, what good are two people dangling in the air, their feet flopping about, both unable to control their emotions?

To get out of the jungle requires a bit of quick thinking every so often. When situations and emotions we are familiar with come across our way, resolving the emotional strain is an easy task. But when we are left with no external reference point for how to deal with the situation, our panic can begin to cloud our cognitive strategies.

Dear Diary…



The key is trying to find out why the shift in continuum occurred. To help you with this, Soetlief advises you to start keeping a mood diary. Make notes of your child’s (and your own) emotional changes, noting the environment and circumstances that could have led to the change. Note how quickly their emotions changed; how well they controlled their emotions; what time of day it is. Consider if any needs or wants were ignored – is your little adventurer possibly thirsty or tired, or simply didn’t get to jump on the trampoline (as you absent-mindedly promised they could but entirely forgot about before you left the restaurant – it happens).

Add your own items to check. Make notes of the good and the bad. Make it the account of you and your child’s journey. In time you’ll start seeing the patterns of your child’s emotional changes, you’ll hear those vines creeping up from a mile away, rarely coming upon an unfamiliar turn on your joyride.

You’ll get it right in time. And when you don’t? Continue with the adventure. In no time you’ll be back to where things look familiar again.